RECIPE FOR HAPPINESS
- Focused Attention in the present moment is where our power lies for happiness. It’s easy to get lost in our thoughts and lose focus on what we’re doing, leading to feelings of overwhelm and stress. However, by being fully present and engaged in the moment, we can cultivate a sense of calm and find joy in our daily life.
When we’re caught up in negative thoughts about the past or worries about the future, it can be easy to fall into a cycle of depression or anxiety. This can be especially difficult when we’re faced with the uncertainties and challenges of raising a child with special needs. It’s important to remember that we have the power to control our thoughts and shift our focus to more positive intentions. If you’re wondering how to get yourself to this place, it starts with finding out where you fall on the happiness continuum, take this free quiz to find out!
Optimism and Happiness is Teachable, Obtainable and Builds Resilience
INGREDIENTS
A beginner’s mind is an important step is cleansing and clearing the container for your recipe for happiness, and is a part of Mindfulness. This means approaching each experience with openness and curiosity, letting go of any preconceived notions and judgements you may bring to the present moment. Not dwelling on past events, or worrying about what might happen in the future, but instead being able to fully experience the present moment. This has become a part of who I am now throughout my life. Letting go of the “stuff” that can affect you in the present moment can be freeing and allow you to be focused more on your values, making good decisions, and living the life you want to live.
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- As a good base ingredient, is a mindfulness practice and where I first learned to deal with my thoughts. As I learned about being present in the moment, it made sense. Having focused attention on the present moment with practice, I was able to experience greater clarity, calmness, and appreciation for things in my world. It allowed me to be better at listening to myself, and my child, enabling me to have more trust in what I thought was important, and have improved my “knowing” for how to react or respond in any given situation.
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- The power in recognizing that we have a choice in how we respond to the unique struggles that can be incredibly difficult to navigate as parents of children with challenges. It’s understandable to feel overwhelmed and frustrated at times, but it’s important to remember that those emotions aren’t permanent. In any given moment, we have the choice to either focus on the negative aspects of our situation or to find moments of joy and gratitude. It’s not always easy, but the ability to make intentional choices can be a powerful tool for finding happiness in difficult circumstances.
By choosing to set positive intentions for positive emotions like gratitude, appreciation, and being present, we can cultivate a more positive mindset and find greater happiness in our daily life. It’s natural to feel tired and overwhelmed at times, but we deserve to live a life filled with hope and positivity.
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- As a parent of children with special needs, hope and optimism can be irreplaceable ingredients used in equal measure, to help us navigate the challenges and setbacks that can arise. By cultivating a mindset of hope, parents can maintain a sense of possibility and potential, even in the face of difficult circumstances. Optimism, too, can provide a sense of resilience and determination that allows parents to view obstacles as opportunities for growth and learning. By focusing on what is possible, rather than what is not, we can tap into innate strengths and resourcefulness, discovering new ways to support our child’s growth and development.
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- It’s important to not be half-baked, and I think it’s necessary to acknowledge that reaching our goals fully baked can often involve difficult and uncomfortable transitions. But by focusing on our ability to adapt and persevere, we can empower ourselves to make the journey as positive as possible. Ultimately, the choice to suffer or to make life better is one that we all face. But by cultivating a sense of resilience and optimism, even in the face of adversity, we can find joy and fulfillment in the journey.
When my son was younger, I had no idea what his adult life would look like. But I decided to let go of any preconceived thoughts of what he could or couldn’t do, and opened myself up to think optimistically and have hope. Ultimately, I found hope and optimism can provide a powerful antidote to feelings of helplessness and despair, empowering me to take a proactive and positive approach to my son’s needs.
With focused attention, being present and having a clear sense of purpose towards goals, we can move beyond the difficulties and find joy and fulfillment in our journey as parents of children with challenges.
HOW TO DEAL WITH DIFFICULT EMOTIONS
As a parent of a child with challenges, it’s natural to experience a range of difficult emotions like overwhelm, frustration, guilt, and shame. While it’s important to acknowledge and process these feelings, it’s equally important to move beyond them and into a more neutral or positive space.
Focused attention on negative thoughts or emotions can create a cycle of negativity that’s hard to break out of. Instead, it’s important to work on shifting your attention to positive thoughts and activities that promote feelings of happiness and well-being.
When negative thoughts or emotions arise, try not to dwell on them. Seek out the support you need and work through them, but don’t allow them to consume you. By staying present in the moment with positive intentions, with focused attention you can begin to move forward towards a more positive space. It only takes a few minutes a day to set an intention and have focused attention on something positive, but the benefits can be profound. Remember, you are worthy of feeling good and finding happiness as a parent of a child with challenges.
THE SECRET INGREDIENT: VALUES
As a parent of a child with challenges, it can be easy to get caught up in the daily struggles and lose sight of your long-term goals. However, by using your values as a guiding force, you can use your focused attention on what truly matters and find success in your efforts.
When you approach your goals in alignment with your values, you not only experience greater motivation, but you also increase the likelihood of experiencing “flow” – a state of complete absorption and engagement in an activity. Know that attention allows other thoughts to come in, but focus does not, so with focused attention this can lead to flow. Flow is like “being in the zone”, when you are losing track of time because you are engaged, focused and content, and in the present moment.
There can be focus without flow, but there can be no flow without focus. So with this alignment, it creates a sense of purpose and meaning, and can lead to a more fulfilling and satisfying life. By identifying and prioritizing your values, you can intentionally shape your goals and activities to tap into this sense of flow. This helps you maintain a sense of momentum and focus, even when faced with challenges. Ultimately, when you prioritize and live through your values, you create a life that feels authentic and fulfilling, allowing you to find success and happiness in your journey as a parent of a child with challenges.
Find out where you fall on the happiness continuum with our Quiz or join the membership, there’s one month free!!
